4/28/05
It has been over nine months since we lost Joshua. We somehow got through the holidays, his birthday and the birth of his daughter. It is very difficult to see this beautiful new life that he helped create and know that he will never get to hold her. He would have been a very proud and wonderful father, I just know it. Josie resembles him and I can't help but see him so clearly when I look into her eyes. I feel as if I am holding him when he was an infant. I just know that when I hold her, he is looking over my shoulder adoring her right along with me.
I remember him playing with Abigail as an infant and toddler. From that I can picture him with his own child. Children really loved him. He just had a knack with kids.
I think about him everyday. It seems that everything I do each day somehow relates to a memory of him. I just can't get him off my mind.
I once saw a young couple at Wal-Mart picking out linens I thought, that should be Josh and Danielle. One day I saw a young man with Josh's build and hairstyle carrying a very young child and at a quick glance I saw Josh carrying Josie. It is the moments like these which help me realize that Josh is with me all of the time.
He is truely missed.
